Nigerian blogger couldn’t defecate for 2 weeks after appendix surgery
By Nigerian blogger Mike Ile…
In July of 2013 I had my appendix removed by the Consultant Surgeon, Doctor Dades. It was at JABI Federal Staff Hospital.
After just two days, flatulence was occurring and I was walking about. Doctor said I was strong enough to be discharged but kept me till the next day. I really liked the man. Very professional.
I thought the worst was over.
A week passed. I was already eating semovita, vegetables, and rice. Lots of meat too. Two weeks passed. And that was when it dawned on me….
I could not pass stool. Even though I had the urge always. I would sit in the toilet for hours but each time I tried to ‘do it’, the measure of pain I felt was out of this world. It was like someone was sawing away in my anus with a hacksaw. I tried forcing it. On two occasions I almost fainted.
My tummy was filled up and bloating. I was eating well. All was stored inside. Nothing was leaving me.
One night, it was in tears I called on my kid brother to drive me to hospital. It was almost 1am as we drove through the empty streets and roads of Abuja. At one point, some policemen stopped us at a checkpoint and wanted to waste our time. One of them will never forget how I screamed at him.
In hospital, a female Doctor pumped me with some slimy liquid from a syringe to induce stooling. I forget the name of that procedure. She tried it four times to no avail.
My brothers and sisters…I saw death o.
I prepared myself to meet God. There was no way I was returning home in that condition. Then a male nurse, Gbenga, came to me and said if I paid him something extra, he could manually remove the stiff block of fecal nonsense that was blocking the path. I agreed.
Dude wore his gloves and inserted 3 fingers into my butt hole. That day I knew what women felt during labour!! My brothers, respect women o. I let out a scream that revived some corpses in the morgue. It was that painful. Dude brought out a tiny, hard block of nonsense. I was almost crying.
“Oga sorry o. E remain two more. Na three dem be”
Long story cut short, I endured the most harrowing experience of my life. When he removed the third one, he told me to run to the toilet.
Brethren, what came out of me that day made me realise that “what is in me is greater than what is in this world”!
I flushed that toilet 7 times.
My tummy flattened out. I cried tears. Hot tears of joy. The relief I felt that night, I have NEVER felt before.
Some things in life that you don’t think about but they kill people daily. Who would have thought that sh*t could kill me. Of all the ailments on earth.
My people don’t joke with sh*t. Sh*t is serious business.
